Now you could look at this in one of 2 ways. One, a third addition to our family of 2, OR an addition to our list of children (the first two being our dog children). Either way you look at it we are pregnant! I very much suspected this during my last week in India, needless to say it was a VERY emotional week full of A LOT of crying! Unfortunately when I returned and discovered it was true, I did not feel any better. Everyone I told was so excited and supportive. I felt like a horrible monster for not knowing what I wanted, and seriously questioning if I could mentally handle a new life that I and my husband would be completely responsible for. We have now known for about 3 weeks and I have told many of the people I work with, most of my family, and my closest friends. I would like to say I am getting used to the idea...no more crying every night (probably thanks to a drop in horomones) and no more feelings of deep despair. It is kindve setting in like... well this is happening another crazy life change that I may or may not be ready for... but what the hell. I am proud of myself for not overreading and obsessing on the internet. Information overload tends to feed your anxieties if you connect at some level with a hypocondriact...
This is a new adventure. I am freaked out... seriously... I always thought I would be one of those people who would be filled with sunshine, bunnies, and rainbows after I found out. It wasnt...and I am not... but I am getting used to the idea.
I think what freaks me out the most are the changes that will happen afterword. I am so afraid I am going to turn in to a mommybot with no brain, no outside interests, and can think about nothing but her offspring. Since that is my greatest fear hopefully I can prevent it from happening. I have had a lot of support and good stories from moms I know, that is really what is helping me through this!
I know it will be okay and as things progress I know that there will be anticipation and excitement. It is just getting over the shock that is the hard part.
This is a new adventure. I am freaked out... seriously... I always thought I would be one of those people who would be filled with sunshine, bunnies, and rainbows after I found out. It wasnt...and I am not... but I am getting used to the idea.
I think what freaks me out the most are the changes that will happen afterword. I am so afraid I am going to turn in to a mommybot with no brain, no outside interests, and can think about nothing but her offspring. Since that is my greatest fear hopefully I can prevent it from happening. I have had a lot of support and good stories from moms I know, that is really what is helping me through this!
I know it will be okay and as things progress I know that there will be anticipation and excitement. It is just getting over the shock that is the hard part.
